Eyes on You.

You know, when Kim talked about "Revelation" during farewell, I had little idea on what it was about, until service, I guess God gave me a little revelation through hers.

During farewell, Kim said something along the line of,

"You may dare to dream frequently for God, dream big for God, but how often do you surrender your dreams to Him?"

This sentence kept repeating in my head as I worshipped God, and there, I made a pact to God.
As I move to a new environment, as I continue to serve Him, I'll continue to dream for God, dream big, dream of the impossibilities, but, I'll also surrender my dreams to Him, acknowledging the fact that my abilities come from Him, knowing that my future is in His hands, and whatever dreams I have, they'll only turn into realities with God's control. So God, hold me accountable, let me offer my dreams to You, my hands and mind to You.

Also, God opened a new chapter in my life.
When I had flashbacks of 2009, and saw the challenges I went through, the amount of growth God placed in me, the habitual sins I shook off, and how I struggled to struggle powerfully, I know that, all has came to an end, and God's doing something new in me. Period.
It was amazing.
Then, I know that God's working on expanding my love, and acceptance. I didn't see Engsheng for no reason, God didn't place Engsheng before my eyes to make me happy in knowing how much he has improved in his illness. As I was sharing with Cheryl about Engsheng, I remembered this story about God's grace, about how undeserving we are of His grace, and therefore when we receive grace, we seek to spread this grace in us from God, and make more people feel loved. Then and there, I realised, I've not been treating others with enough grace, I though I did, but no.
I don't want to tolerate, but I want to accept.
No matter how much I've hurt God, or been hurting God, though God feels sad, though I break God's heart at times, He never complains, but always treat me with grace. I'm not deserving at all, but God still choose to give me grace, to give me love. I want to be an authentic disciple of God, therefore I want to treat others with grace as well. The grace I give of course, can't be compared to God's, neither does it comes from me. Grace, is something I lack. And in order to expand my love and acceptance, I need to be gracious, I need to work on having grace.
I couldn't help but to feel like crying the entire time after that.

I had an awesome chat with God last night, the conversation was the longest I ever had, I think. Shaing with Him how thankful I am, how I feel about the revelation and reflections. I had closures in myself on certain matters, and I had new aims, new objectives, new goals to obtain for. So God, thank You. (:

Tomorrow's the release of O's Results, where my prayer will be answered, my calling will be confirmed. Many are afraid, but you know what, I'm excited and happy, because God has prepared me a long way till this day, I'm looking forward to what He has laid down for me.
Path the ways, light the way, and reveal Your plans for me. I'm ready to follow. :D