Grandmother Story

During dinner with my cousin awhile back, she told me that relief washed over her as she counted down to the end of 2013. I share the same sentiments and I'm just so glad that (probably the worse year ever) 2013 is finally a closed chapter. I wouldn't say that 2013 was disastrous (though it was relatively close to being in hell), it taught me a whole lot more about myself. I learnt to be courageous, to love myself more and that being selfish when one needs to is perfectly okay. I learnt to admit my weaknesses rather than always putting up a strong front to others. I lost a lot, but gained abundantly in return. I gave parts of me away and was this close to falling apart, breaking down completely. I screwed up like never before so that I can learn to pick myself up again when I fall. Most importantly, I learnt that life is uniquely and imperfectly beautiful, and this beauty is what I need to appreciate.

2013 was a year full of changes, a straight head-on marathon. The feeling of not being able to breathe, an overwhelming influx of thoughts and probably a million gallon of tears. That was how 2013 started out for me. I was this close to being depressed and that was a situation I've never imagined myself to be in. I found out my limits, and exceeded them in too short a time. I was learning to love and yet loved to the best I could, my heart was placed in the open field and got trampled on all over. I realized how easy it was for me to down my worth, and that I deserve a lot more than I thought I did. I settled for okay, but definitely not the best. I thought I was happy, but I didn't realize how much I was actually breaking inside. 

They say that only with darkness then you can see how bright stars do shine. 2013 showed me that I'm a very blessed kid as I've friends and family who're always behind me and giving me support in every way they can. Old buddies, new friends, I was lucky enough to meet people who are willing to accept me the way I am. As much as I can be noisy and embarrassing a lot of times, I'm blessed with friends who willingly stands up for me and protects me from bad things (or bad person haha). I won't be unable to stay sane if not for their constant support and love no matter how much of a mess I am.

For the ones who stayed, thank you for growing up with me.

So far, 2014 started out just right. Things may not be any easier but I'm sure it'll be better.
All a little wiser, a little more rational and I know that I'm completely recovered and at the same time, watched over.